Slowing down enough to let the words
move from my brain to my hand
taking a breath between thoughts
this pause that doesn’t really exist
Feeling out of practice with keeping a schedule
a lack of discipline that I can’t allow
The chaos of my freedom breeds hedonism
The irony of a Zen hedonist does not escape me
In these times of settling, I won’t
in these times of seeking relief, I won’t
in the times of waiting for inevitability, I won’t
Feeling out of practice with keeping my mouth shut
a lack of tact and compassion I can’t allow.
Disillusioned with freedom, security breeds contempt
The irony of being free, but not safe, or vice versa
does not escape me.
Slowing down enough to let my thoughts come one at a time.
Keeping some space between my heart and my mind
taking a breath between words
this moment is all that exists.